Wednesday, 18 May 2011
Some time in LA
Spent some good time with a friend down in Burbank, Ca. Where she lives and she wanted to take pictures of me in my new hat. These pictures make me realize what a beautiful person I am and give me hope for love again.
Saturday, 14 May 2011
Life at the Moment
Is in a full fledged furry! I am moving on to new and bigger pastures. After 10 years of being together my boyfriend (now ex) and I are officially parting ways. Its been a few months of seperation at this point but I know that I was miserable for a long time as was he. We were both trying to force something that wasnt there. True deep down meaningful love. Not that it wasnt ever, but it had faded. I think it had a lot to do with who we both are, and what we want in life. I want more than he does, always have and that has never changed. He used to want that, now his focus is on career and money. Mine fullfillment of lifes adventures with a touch of career and money.
I know that we needed this to happen but it is one of the hardest changes I have had to undergo, the process of searching for myself again. Finding the things that used to make me happy and that I enjoy. I know that I was trying to change him, and make him that man that I know is out there that will make me happy. Sometimes seperation does make the heart grow fonder but in this instance, no. There will be a lot of memories...mostly good but the last year and a half will be the hardest to part with.
On a side note, I also bought a new car. Out with the old and in with the new. Helps the healing process a bit. The old car did me well for a while but now I have the car that I originally wanted when I bought the other one a year and a half ago.
I am officially moving back to the Bay Area...I have been offered and accepted my dream job of working at LPCH- the Childrens hospital at Stanford University. So yes, another change, but it is my ability to handle change that I know I am best at. I welcome it and usually seek it out. Although I must say not all of the changes that have occurred in my life have not been positive, what doesnt kill us makes us stronger right?
I am finding myself again...eating right, exercizing everyday and fulfilled with most everything in life. I know that out there is the man I know who will be appreciative, and love me for who I am.
I know that we needed this to happen but it is one of the hardest changes I have had to undergo, the process of searching for myself again. Finding the things that used to make me happy and that I enjoy. I know that I was trying to change him, and make him that man that I know is out there that will make me happy. Sometimes seperation does make the heart grow fonder but in this instance, no. There will be a lot of memories...mostly good but the last year and a half will be the hardest to part with.
On a side note, I also bought a new car. Out with the old and in with the new. Helps the healing process a bit. The old car did me well for a while but now I have the car that I originally wanted when I bought the other one a year and a half ago.
I am officially moving back to the Bay Area...I have been offered and accepted my dream job of working at LPCH- the Childrens hospital at Stanford University. So yes, another change, but it is my ability to handle change that I know I am best at. I welcome it and usually seek it out. Although I must say not all of the changes that have occurred in my life have not been positive, what doesnt kill us makes us stronger right?
I am finding myself again...eating right, exercizing everyday and fulfilled with most everything in life. I know that out there is the man I know who will be appreciative, and love me for who I am.
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